Protect Yourself from Domestic Violence

Domestic violence is not only in the form of physical acts, but also psychologically and sexually. If you do not get out of this situation immediately, the risk of serious injury, disruption to health, to death, lurks in plain sight. Domestic violence (KDRT) is all behavior of threats, harassment, and violence both physically, psychologically, and sexually between two people who are bound by personal relationships or to other family members. Perpetrators of domestic violence can also be a former spouse despite being separated. Everyone can have the chance to become a perpetrator or victim of domestic violence. But in fact, most victims of domestic violence in Indonesia are women. A research survey found that around 30 percent of Indonesian women had experienced domestic violence. Some even occur since a pregnant woman. the other side, although considered as a stronger party, but violence can also be experienced by men, especially men who are in same-sex relationships. This situation can also be more difficult for men, because they do not want to be called weaker than their partners. Domestic violence is also not uncommon among transgender, bisexual and lesbian people. The perpetrators of violence against this group often convince their victims that the police will not help someone who likes the same sex, or they can threaten to spread the victim's sexual orientation to others.

Types of Domestic Violence

Violence is not only physical, but also psychological and sexual which can occur continuously. Threats with weapons and death are the greatest risks that can arise if domestic violence is not stopped. Signs of physical violence in the household can be very real, for example in the form of wounds and bruises. But psychological violence can only be felt by victims, such as stress and depression. A woman may not know that she is experiencing domestic violence. Check the following signs to find out if you have experienced or are experiencing domestic violence.

• Emotional violence:

• Your partner criticizes or insults you in public.
• Your partner blames you for their rude behavior and says that you deserve it.
• You often feel afraid of your partner.
• You change certain habits or behaviors to avoid an angry partner.
• Your partner forbids you from working or continuing your studies.
• Your partner forbids you from meeting family or friends.
• Your partner accuses you of having an affair and is always suspicious if you look close or talk to other people.
• Couples are always hungry for attention with irrational reasons.

• Intimidation and threats:

• Your partner has ever thrown away or destroyed your property.
• Your partner constantly follows and wants to know where you are.
• The couple threatens to kill himself or kill your child.
• Your partner always checks your personal items, reads your short messages and e-mails.
• The clothes you wear or the food you consume are controlled by them.
• Your partner limits the money you hold so that you cannot buy important needs for yourself and your child.
• Harassment of religion, disability or physical, ethnic, racial, or social strata between partners can also be categorized as domestic violence.

• Physical abuse

• Couples beat, slap, kick, strangle, pull hair, even burn your limbs and / your child.
• Binding you or locking you in the house.
• Addicted to alcoholic beverages and / or illegal drugs, and behave rudely after consuming these substances.

• Sexual violence:

• He forces you to do something you don't want to do, including having sex.
• He touches your sensitive limbs in an inappropriate way.
• He hurt you during sexual intercourse.
• He Forces you to have sexual relations with other people.
• He forces you not to wear condoms or other contraceptives.

After committing domestic violence, your partner may apologize and promise you will not repeat their mistakes, even give a gift to make up for their guilt. But in fact, domestic violence continues to repeat itself.

Save yourself

Trying to get out of a violent relationship is often not easy. Financial dependency can make women often survive in this dangerous situation. Not infrequently, victims of domestic violence who try to run get worse violence if caught. Husbands who torture their wives also often do not want them to take their children away. The longer it lasts in a domestic violence situation, the greater the threat that is threatening. Not only to yourself, but also to children. If you have long wanted to get out of life full of violence and pressure, here are the steps that can be a guide:

• Tell your condition to the people closest to you that you can trust. Make sure the perpetrator isn't around, when you inform this.
• Document your injuries with a camera. Save carefully.
• Record the violent behavior you received and the time it occurred.
• Avoid fighting violence with violence, because it risks making the perpetrators act more extreme.
• If you are ready to leave home:

- With care, prepare a bag containing all your important needs. Bring important personal documents, such as identity cards, money and medicines. Place the bag in a safe and hidden place.
- Use a new number and / or communication device to communicate, just in case it is not traced. Likewise with your computer and electronic mail. Perpetrators may check what pages you open and who you communicate with. Change the password to enter your e-mail and delete information wherever you have surfed the internet.
- Know exactly where you are going and how to get to that location. In this case, you can ask someone else for help to pick up at a place.
-If you bring your own vehicle, remove the GPS device or location tracker from the vehicle.

In addition, although domestic violence may only affect one partner and does not occur in children, children who witness violence have the risk of growing into individuals who also like to commit violence. Children who often witness violence also risk experiencing psychological disorders, aggressive behavior, and low self-esteem. In Indonesia, in the Domestic Violence Act article 26 paragraph 1, it states that only victims can report directly on this violence to the police. However, Article 15 of the Domestic Violence Law states that everyone who hears, sees, or knows about domestic violence is required to make efforts to prevent acts of violence, provide assistance and protection, and assist in the process of proposing protection. Victims of domestic violence can report the violence they experienced to the One Service public service center, the Integrated Service Center for Women and Children Empowerment, the National Commission for Women, or the Women's and Child Services units in the resort police in each region.